Well, I wanted to give a quick update to those of you wondering about my wandering. I have accepted the position with Sprint and I start on Monday. That is one of the reasons I took the position, money is the other one, another one is that it's familiar, and they are a great company to work for. They have always taken care of me (That should be a given I suppose, since this is my third time back with them. I'm sure they are thinking they hope the third time really is a charm.). I'm going to stay at Domino's, at least for the meanwhile to see how that plays out. I am NOT all about the money by any means, I want to be able to live my life, not work my life. Although a little extra never hurt anyone.
As far as a church goes, I worked my last day cleaning the church today, Saturday. I will probably visit on one fine Sunday morning very soon, just to say my final goodbyes, and of course, turn in my keys. We are looking forward to visiting some churches that we have heard a lot about. Frontline, Skyline, Believer's Church, Fusion Church, Bridgeway, First Church just to name a few. Of course, we are still part of Mars Hill, which we never know where that will lead. It's been a crazy, wild ride so far, and no reason to expect it will change too much.
Don't get me wrong, we do plan to put down some roots before too long, but at the same time, we understand the value of checking out these churches we are so curious about, and we may make it to all of them more than once, I don't know, but we are not church-hoppers although we are going to do some church-hopping for exploration's sake, not to church-shop if you will. WE ARE THE CHURCH, so even if you show up at my doorstep, we can have church in my house.... or the local coffee shop.... of the local asian restaurant....
OK, Random writing #1 for this blog, It's 1 am on Sunday morning and I am sitting in our library listening to asian karaoke.... yes, you heard me correctly. The people across the street and about three doors to the west of us have people over and hold karaoke in their house, or out back or out front, somewhere, but it's loud. They do this about 2 to 3 times a month. Luckily, we sleep with a fan on and our house is pretty well insulated so we can sleep, that is not why I am up at this time of night. This is just one more reason I absolutely love the neighborhood we are in. (By the way, right now, it sounds kind of like native american singing) Reminds me of Red Earth Festival. OK, time for bed...
Sunday, September 14, 2008
Sunday, September 7, 2008
Wandering, but not lost!
I have been without full-time employment now for 23 days. I'm not fearful, not anxious, not worried about the bills or any of that. God is faithful and has blessed us financially many times, this time is not the first and won't be the last. I have taken a job as a part-time delivery driver for Domino's. Something I always wanted to try since I went through Dave Ramsey's course and now I am doing it. I am making decent money and working a few hours.
I've also been cleaning Harrah Church since the first of August for the most part. This is part-time as well. I've been doing it to help them out while they find someone else to do it since we lost our guy right before I quit the church. It's also been helping us out financially having that little extra coming in. I have had a full-time job offer for about three weeks, but that training doesn't start until the 29th of Sept. I could start tomorrow morning, because I'm on a standby team in case people don't show to training. I also have a job offer coming tomorrow or Tuesday from Sprint. Yep, my old faithful! The call center though, not retail. I am being hired, just don't know the details yet (i.e., salary, start date, etc.) So here I am working two part-time jobs, with two full-time jobs in the bag, not sure what to do right now. I'm not too worried about it, God has proven His ways lots of times long before I get around to screwing them up (thank you Lord for that).
Now, we are also wandering when it comes to planting our feet in a church. You know, I have always said that we would remain at Harrah for a while, not every Sunday, but probably half-time for a few months, but I don't know if that is going to be possible. We have a lot of good friends there, don't get me wrong. I was there for such a time as this, or that it was at least, but I am starting to understand why people actually leave the local church body after they quit working for it.
It's hard, very hard, because you still look at everything through the eyes of a staff member, except you are no longer on staff. See, all the stuff I have done over the last 19 months are not important to most people. It was important to me! So now, stuff that bugs me is being done, but when I was on staff I could make sure they were not being done, so I feel like part of where I have helped bring the church to this higher level of excellence in some areas is beginning to slip. Now to be fair, there are areas I did not excel in that are now being raised to a level of excellence I could not bring them to which was one of the big reason for me leaving. I felt like I had done what God had me there to do and helped raise the bar.
I guess my hope and prayer was, and is, that the level of excellence we had attained in the areas I was directly responsible for would continue on and then new people would bring other areas up to a level of excellence that had never been seen in other areas, thus creating and keeping the levels of excellence high.
I tend to be very critical though and my way is the right way if I'm the expert in the matter, or at least more of the expert than anyone else and in a lot of areas, I am the expert, or was.... so, it's with a sad heart that I am saying goodbye to my life of the last two+ years and moving on. I plan on staying in touch with some people, but I must move on. God has released me and I've done all I could do to pass on my knowledge and now people must take it upon themselves to keep pushing to raise the bar in areas where it needs to be and to keep the bar raised in areas that it already has been worked on.
There will always be a part of Harrah Church in my soul and I will pray that HC continues to reach people that others cannot or will not reach, but my time there is complete, satisfied, concluded and finalized. I learned a ton working with the people I have worked with and for. I have been a valued staff member and go-to guy. I have been a great leader and I have been a terrible leader. I have shown people the love of Christ and I have probably pushed some away unfortunately. I have done it all because of my desire to show people a servant's heart and a servant leader. Please forgive me if you are the ones I pushed away, while continuing that legacy if you have been helped.
I say goodbye for now until I see you again someday... on the street, in the store, or in our resting place. I will pray for you and with you, please do the same for me. You will be missed!
Not all who wander are lost! ~ J.R. Tolkien
I've also been cleaning Harrah Church since the first of August for the most part. This is part-time as well. I've been doing it to help them out while they find someone else to do it since we lost our guy right before I quit the church. It's also been helping us out financially having that little extra coming in. I have had a full-time job offer for about three weeks, but that training doesn't start until the 29th of Sept. I could start tomorrow morning, because I'm on a standby team in case people don't show to training. I also have a job offer coming tomorrow or Tuesday from Sprint. Yep, my old faithful! The call center though, not retail. I am being hired, just don't know the details yet (i.e., salary, start date, etc.) So here I am working two part-time jobs, with two full-time jobs in the bag, not sure what to do right now. I'm not too worried about it, God has proven His ways lots of times long before I get around to screwing them up (thank you Lord for that).
Now, we are also wandering when it comes to planting our feet in a church. You know, I have always said that we would remain at Harrah for a while, not every Sunday, but probably half-time for a few months, but I don't know if that is going to be possible. We have a lot of good friends there, don't get me wrong. I was there for such a time as this, or that it was at least, but I am starting to understand why people actually leave the local church body after they quit working for it.
It's hard, very hard, because you still look at everything through the eyes of a staff member, except you are no longer on staff. See, all the stuff I have done over the last 19 months are not important to most people. It was important to me! So now, stuff that bugs me is being done, but when I was on staff I could make sure they were not being done, so I feel like part of where I have helped bring the church to this higher level of excellence in some areas is beginning to slip. Now to be fair, there are areas I did not excel in that are now being raised to a level of excellence I could not bring them to which was one of the big reason for me leaving. I felt like I had done what God had me there to do and helped raise the bar.
I guess my hope and prayer was, and is, that the level of excellence we had attained in the areas I was directly responsible for would continue on and then new people would bring other areas up to a level of excellence that had never been seen in other areas, thus creating and keeping the levels of excellence high.
I tend to be very critical though and my way is the right way if I'm the expert in the matter, or at least more of the expert than anyone else and in a lot of areas, I am the expert, or was.... so, it's with a sad heart that I am saying goodbye to my life of the last two+ years and moving on. I plan on staying in touch with some people, but I must move on. God has released me and I've done all I could do to pass on my knowledge and now people must take it upon themselves to keep pushing to raise the bar in areas where it needs to be and to keep the bar raised in areas that it already has been worked on.
There will always be a part of Harrah Church in my soul and I will pray that HC continues to reach people that others cannot or will not reach, but my time there is complete, satisfied, concluded and finalized. I learned a ton working with the people I have worked with and for. I have been a valued staff member and go-to guy. I have been a great leader and I have been a terrible leader. I have shown people the love of Christ and I have probably pushed some away unfortunately. I have done it all because of my desire to show people a servant's heart and a servant leader. Please forgive me if you are the ones I pushed away, while continuing that legacy if you have been helped.
I say goodbye for now until I see you again someday... on the street, in the store, or in our resting place. I will pray for you and with you, please do the same for me. You will be missed!
Not all who wander are lost! ~ J.R. Tolkien
Saturday, June 21, 2008
Eating the Grain!
I spent the afternoon yesterday with a friend of mine who is a wheat farmer. It was quite amazing seeing wheat harvested for the very first time in my life. I hit the road shortly before noon on my way to Omega, about 15 miles west of Kingfisher. It was a quiet drive, nice, with spotted puffy white clouds in the sky. I felt peaceful, at ease, calm.
Pulling up to the wheat field, next to his big semi-truck and trailer, I felt pretty small. I got out of my car and climbed up onto his trailer. He had already dumped one load out of the combine into the trailer, so I immediately figured out that what I had thought was being harvested off of the stalks was not the actual product. (I felt pretty ignorant not even knowing which part of the stalk gets harvested, but he was very gracious in the passing on of his knowledge.) I almost felt like a little kid getting to climb all over this big semi-truck. Jeff was in the field harvesting; I could see him not far away. I'm sure he could see me climbing on his truck like a little kid on a new playground. I have to say, it almost felt like that honestly.
As he pulled the combine up next to the truck and started dumping a new load of grain, I felt the hugeness of the combine, even dwarfing the semi-trailer to some degree. As he finished dumping the grain, he welcomed me to his field, his "payday" as he put it. We jumped in the combine and took off. It was amazing, and quite weird, sitting right above the reel (which I called a sickle blade), surrounded by glass on three sides, one of which looked like you could fall right out of down in to the auger assembly. He made sure to tell me not to lean on the front glass, there was no way he could stop that auger before I entered the shoot. It would not have been healthy.
I felt like a kid in junior high as he began to tell me about the field and the grain and the equipment. I was soaking in this experience, not because it was so exciting, but because it was part of so many people's lives, including my friend Jeff. In fact, it was his life and always had been. It was his dad's life before his. Truth be told, it was exciting in it's own way. Jeff was passing on knowledge to me. He was passing on life to me, and he was passing on love to me. He was taking what he knew and sharing it with a friend. He was sharing his life in a way that he didn't often get to.
Towards the end of the day, we pulled the combine up to the truck to unload one last load to take to the elevator and then hauled it off. When we got back to the field, we just spent a few minutes walking through the field. Jeff reminded me of the story of Jesus and his followers in Luke 6:1"One Sabbath Jesus was going through the grainfields, and his disciples began to pick some heads of grain, rub them in their hands and eat the kernels." So, Jeff showed me hot to pull off some of the heads of the stalks and grind them in my hand so that I could sift the chaff through my fingers. He then convinced me to try the kernels of wheat, just like Jesus' disciples ate. It was kind of weird at first, but as I tried them and started chewing, I realized that it was really not bad. It was more like a weird texture of wood/nut and tasted like wheat flour and a little nutty as well.
We talked about how cool it was to experience the Bible in this way. Don't get me wrong, this was no eye-opening, WOW, experience, however it was one of those experiences I will never forget, simply because I was able to realize, and walk in and participate in the path of Jesus for but just a glimpse of time.
Pulling up to the wheat field, next to his big semi-truck and trailer, I felt pretty small. I got out of my car and climbed up onto his trailer. He had already dumped one load out of the combine into the trailer, so I immediately figured out that what I had thought was being harvested off of the stalks was not the actual product. (I felt pretty ignorant not even knowing which part of the stalk gets harvested, but he was very gracious in the passing on of his knowledge.) I almost felt like a little kid getting to climb all over this big semi-truck. Jeff was in the field harvesting; I could see him not far away. I'm sure he could see me climbing on his truck like a little kid on a new playground. I have to say, it almost felt like that honestly.
As he pulled the combine up next to the truck and started dumping a new load of grain, I felt the hugeness of the combine, even dwarfing the semi-trailer to some degree. As he finished dumping the grain, he welcomed me to his field, his "payday" as he put it. We jumped in the combine and took off. It was amazing, and quite weird, sitting right above the reel (which I called a sickle blade), surrounded by glass on three sides, one of which looked like you could fall right out of down in to the auger assembly. He made sure to tell me not to lean on the front glass, there was no way he could stop that auger before I entered the shoot. It would not have been healthy.
I felt like a kid in junior high as he began to tell me about the field and the grain and the equipment. I was soaking in this experience, not because it was so exciting, but because it was part of so many people's lives, including my friend Jeff. In fact, it was his life and always had been. It was his dad's life before his. Truth be told, it was exciting in it's own way. Jeff was passing on knowledge to me. He was passing on life to me, and he was passing on love to me. He was taking what he knew and sharing it with a friend. He was sharing his life in a way that he didn't often get to.
Towards the end of the day, we pulled the combine up to the truck to unload one last load to take to the elevator and then hauled it off. When we got back to the field, we just spent a few minutes walking through the field. Jeff reminded me of the story of Jesus and his followers in Luke 6:1"One Sabbath Jesus was going through the grainfields, and his disciples began to pick some heads of grain, rub them in their hands and eat the kernels." So, Jeff showed me hot to pull off some of the heads of the stalks and grind them in my hand so that I could sift the chaff through my fingers. He then convinced me to try the kernels of wheat, just like Jesus' disciples ate. It was kind of weird at first, but as I tried them and started chewing, I realized that it was really not bad. It was more like a weird texture of wood/nut and tasted like wheat flour and a little nutty as well.
We talked about how cool it was to experience the Bible in this way. Don't get me wrong, this was no eye-opening, WOW, experience, however it was one of those experiences I will never forget, simply because I was able to realize, and walk in and participate in the path of Jesus for but just a glimpse of time.
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Spiritual Bulimia
I'm reading a book right now that is really hitting home for me. I mean, I am reading inside of this book about feelings I have had for 4, 5 even 6 years now, but I have never put into words, never thought them through. It is such an awesome feeling. I'm going to quote out of the book here in just a second, but let set this up first. Well... on second thought, I'll talk about it after this quote from the book.
Previous to this quote he is talking about becoming a believer and people telling him what Christians believed, but not teaching him how Christians live.
The Irresistible Revolution, Shane Claiborne, Pg 39
"So as we do in our culture, I thought perhaps I needed to buy more stuff, Christian stuff. Luckily, I found an entire Christian industrial complex ready to help with Christian music, bumper stickers, T0shirts, books, and even candy..... They had lists of bands and the Christian alternatives to them, so I got rid of all my old CDs. (And I must confess, I was a bit disappointed by the Christian counterfeit. Who could compare to Guns N' Roses and Vanilla Ice?) And I bought books, devotionals, T-shirts. I developed a common illness that haunts Western Christianity. I call it spiritual bulimia. Bulimia, of course, is a tragic eating disorder, largely linked to identity and image, where folks consume large amounts of food but vomit it up before it has a chance to digest. I developed the spiritual form of it where I did my devotions, read all the new Christian books and saw the Christian movies, and then vomited information up to friends, small groups, and pastors. But it had never had the chance to digest. I had gorged myself on all the products of the Christian industrial complex but was spiritually starving to death. I was marked by an overconsumptive but malnourished spirituality, suffocated by Christianity but thirsty for God."
This is exactly what I feel like I have done until the last couple of months. I feel like I have only regurgitated other peoples beliefs to my friends and families through conversations, etc. I don't feel like I knew what I believed or why. I know that I believed, but I just didn't know on my own terms, I knew, because it made sense. The problem was, I wasn't living my faith. I didn't have a chance to live my faith, I was living the faith of the authors that I was reading, or I was living the faith I was taught in church, or talked about with my friends, not because it was my faith, but simply because that was what Christians did, they regurgitated information to each other and passed it down the line so that everyone can be the good little Christian.
Guess what, I am believing now and living MY faith now, for probably the very first time in my life. There are people who don't get it, there are people who wonder what the heck I am doing, and there are people who are right where I am. I love it. Don't get me wrong, I don't have it figured out by any means, but I have a faith that is coming alive.
Previous to this quote he is talking about becoming a believer and people telling him what Christians believed, but not teaching him how Christians live.
The Irresistible Revolution, Shane Claiborne, Pg 39
"So as we do in our culture, I thought perhaps I needed to buy more stuff, Christian stuff. Luckily, I found an entire Christian industrial complex ready to help with Christian music, bumper stickers, T0shirts, books, and even candy..... They had lists of bands and the Christian alternatives to them, so I got rid of all my old CDs. (And I must confess, I was a bit disappointed by the Christian counterfeit. Who could compare to Guns N' Roses and Vanilla Ice?) And I bought books, devotionals, T-shirts. I developed a common illness that haunts Western Christianity. I call it spiritual bulimia. Bulimia, of course, is a tragic eating disorder, largely linked to identity and image, where folks consume large amounts of food but vomit it up before it has a chance to digest. I developed the spiritual form of it where I did my devotions, read all the new Christian books and saw the Christian movies, and then vomited information up to friends, small groups, and pastors. But it had never had the chance to digest. I had gorged myself on all the products of the Christian industrial complex but was spiritually starving to death. I was marked by an overconsumptive but malnourished spirituality, suffocated by Christianity but thirsty for God."
This is exactly what I feel like I have done until the last couple of months. I feel like I have only regurgitated other peoples beliefs to my friends and families through conversations, etc. I don't feel like I knew what I believed or why. I know that I believed, but I just didn't know on my own terms, I knew, because it made sense. The problem was, I wasn't living my faith. I didn't have a chance to live my faith, I was living the faith of the authors that I was reading, or I was living the faith I was taught in church, or talked about with my friends, not because it was my faith, but simply because that was what Christians did, they regurgitated information to each other and passed it down the line so that everyone can be the good little Christian.
Guess what, I am believing now and living MY faith now, for probably the very first time in my life. There are people who don't get it, there are people who wonder what the heck I am doing, and there are people who are right where I am. I love it. Don't get me wrong, I don't have it figured out by any means, but I have a faith that is coming alive.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
I feel like an artist....kinda!
I started pottery class again tonight. I took classes back in Oct, Nov & December last year and ended up making a lot of our Christmas presents. It worked out well since we participated in Advent Conspiracy. I had always wanted to try it and wasn't sure I really liked it, but then I saw how other people reacted to my pottery, yes MINE. It was a crazy good feeling!
So, why did I wait six months to start going again? I'm not sure. I almost put it off again tonight, because I have so much other stuff I need to do (like find a job), but I went ahead and went. I am so glad I did. When I last went, I was making approximately one item per night, but when I got there this evening, I already knew what I wanted to do and I jumped right on it. I was able to make three things in one night. That's incredible... at least for me. AND, I was happy with every one of them. The spoon rest is a little frufru for me, but I think people will like it.
Anyway, for any of you who are interested, I thought I would post some pics of my pieces I gave away last December. Unfortunately, Becca is working so I'm not sure where to start looking so I'll try to post those at a later date. If you are interested in classes, it's only around $60 for four weeks, and believe me, after that first four weeks, you'll know if you like it. I take classes at Paseo Pottery, down on 30th and Paseo Drive on Tuesday nights. I think he also has classes on Saturdays.
I've decided I'm going to be creating pottery at least once per week, and Rebecca and I are going to start setting up at shows to try to sell our respective art.
I know that surprises some of you that I take pottery classes so what is something that would surprise me about you?
So, why did I wait six months to start going again? I'm not sure. I almost put it off again tonight, because I have so much other stuff I need to do (like find a job), but I went ahead and went. I am so glad I did. When I last went, I was making approximately one item per night, but when I got there this evening, I already knew what I wanted to do and I jumped right on it. I was able to make three things in one night. That's incredible... at least for me. AND, I was happy with every one of them. The spoon rest is a little frufru for me, but I think people will like it.
Anyway, for any of you who are interested, I thought I would post some pics of my pieces I gave away last December. Unfortunately, Becca is working so I'm not sure where to start looking so I'll try to post those at a later date. If you are interested in classes, it's only around $60 for four weeks, and believe me, after that first four weeks, you'll know if you like it. I take classes at Paseo Pottery, down on 30th and Paseo Drive on Tuesday nights. I think he also has classes on Saturdays.
I've decided I'm going to be creating pottery at least once per week, and Rebecca and I are going to start setting up at shows to try to sell our respective art.
I know that surprises some of you that I take pottery classes so what is something that would surprise me about you?
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